A Wedding Invitation and Procrastination
By Aaron Caruso
How avoiding confrontation at any cost became the heaviest price to pay
Wedding Invitations are usually few and far between, but there was a time when I received two invitations in a matter of months, and it was an honor to receive them both. Nevertheless, I never responded to the second wedding invitation, nor mentioned to my friend that I had even received it.
You may be asking yourself why I never responded to the second invitation. I’ve asked myself that same question too, and I assure you – my lack of response had no malicious intent. But as you could probably guess, my silence led to an estranged friendship. I completely disappeared because of embarrassment and procrastination. If I could go back in time, I would do things differently. I’d quickly respond to my friend’s wedding invitation and explain to him why I couldn’t attend. Let me fill you in on those details.
When I was at my other friend’s wedding, I had a great time, but my drive home was a nightmare. About two hours into my five-hour journey, my car suddenly broke down. After a long wait in the middle of the night, a tow truck finally came to bring me to the nearest town with a car repair shop and hotel. The repairs were costly, but I still felt blessed to return home unscathed. However, I came to realize that my car was unreliable for road trips, and I was sure that my old, worn-out vehicle would leave me stranded if I ignored my better judgment and hit the road again. It was now just barely getting me around town, and there was no way I could push my car beyond its limits without dire consequences. When I received the second wedding invitation and saw that the ceremony was hundreds of miles away, I knew I couldn’t attend.
Not driving to the wedding was the right decision, but not telling my friend why I couldn’t come was one of the most boneheaded decisions of my life. Had I told him, maybe he would have connected me with someone I could’ve gotten a ride with, or maybe he would have simply said that he understood my situation. I’ll never know for sure because I never gave him the chance. What I do know for sure is that he wouldn’t have been upset or offended at all, because he was one of the kindest and most easygoing friends I’ve ever had.
I didn’t see my friend again until about a year after his wedding. I had completely lost touch with him because I was ashamed to call and say, “Hey, how are you? Oh, by the way, I’m sorry that I never responded to your wedding invitation.” But in reality, that’s exactly what I should have done. When I bumped into him at the mall, he was his normal smiling self, yet I could still feel the tension from the elephant in the room. Some things needed to be said, but I must confess that I failed to say them. I stuck to safe, small talk until we parted ways. My opportunity to make amends had been totally wasted, and it was yet again embarrassment and procrastination that stopped me from doing the right thing.
That was the last time I saw my friend. A short time later, I left the area to seek new opportunities after my college graduation. The future looks bright, but there’s still something I need to rectify from my past. Because I don’t have my friend’s current phone number or email, I tried finding him on social media and search engines, but he’s nowhere to be found. So it’s time to make a public apology. Wayne, I’m sorry that I never explained to you why I couldn’t attend your wedding, nor even had the decency to RSVP when I received your invitation. I believe that you, of all people, would have been gracious and understanding. This is long overdue, but I want to say thank you very much for inviting me to your wedding. And if I ever find you, you’ll be receiving an invitation to my future wedding in the mail.
Aaron Caruso is a freelance writer. Some of his articles are published in Today’s Christian Living, The Upper Room, The Secret Place, and Prayer Connect. His passion is to inspire and encourage others to live a more abundant life in Christ.
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