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Adoption Not Abortion


By Cyndi McDaniel

  When I first heard about the New York legislation on abortion I remained quiet while I tried to let what happened, sink in.  All day I read post after post on Facebook of outraged people expressing their feelings.  I felt like I was kind of in shock.  That whole first day I just kept thinking that this has to be joke.  How could someone  abort a full term baby?  As that first day ended and the next day dawned  I began to let the reality of what COULD have been, run from my mind to my heart.  I felt warm tears run down my face and I felt like I could barely breath. I didn’t audibly say anything to any one, yet  I just silently cried out to my Heavenly Father.  This one hit close to home for me.  It was personal.  This could have affected our family.  Our boys.  Our sons!  Not just one son, THREE sons! I had already held one son in my arms as he took his last breath and it suddenly hit me we could have been minus  three more.  You see, my husband and I  have three adopted boys  from a special needs’ adoption agency in the heart of New York City.  (Joseph) a Hispanic  26 week gestation micro-preemie who has spastic quadriplegic Cerebral Palsy and eats by G-tube, (Jaden) a 30 week gestation, Jamaican cocaine baby. A micro preemie with a severe lung disease and  (Jacob) a Puerto Rican cocaine baby with severe ADHD. Two of the birth moms kept  their pregnancies from their families so they could place the babies for adoption.   To the best of my knowledge those grandparents do noteven know our boys exist.    All three boys’ parents lived in New York City at the time of their births and chose life(adoption) for them when they were born. They chose Adoption not Abortion. Each mother knew that they carried a son who  was special needs , there were disabilities present,   or at least the strong possibility it would present itself after delivery.   Thankfully each mother  still chose Life.    What if those birth moms were pregnant now? Each of them presented with a stereotypical (reason) for abortion.   They could have been pressured or presented with the choice to abort our sons after they found out about the disabilities.    I couldn’t even imagine life without the light our boys shed on our family and those who know them.  If you could just see (and hear ) The sound of our severely handicapped son singing at the top of his lungs to praise music or hear him calling me from the next room “mom you gotta see this”.  Dance parties in his room.  His teacher taught him the Christian praise song Flawless and that little boy will look at us and say, “God made Joe Joe Flawless” and  know what? He did! God made our Joseph Flawless! Just like he is! And  our  other two sons.  They are little caterpillars that we’ve  watched become butterflies right before our  eyes. Jacob and Jaden.    Little leaders. Little boys that are confident, smart and have fought against the odds to already be more   than they were ever supposed to be.  One of our sons was  described by the adoption agency as “the ugliest baby we’ve ever seen” before the adoption agency placed him with us.   It almost makes me laugh when I think about it.  He’s beautiful now!    To the eyes on the outside but even more on the inside. What if his mother had aborted him because of malformed anomalies in utero?  That’s what we were told when they first called us about his placement. 

Both Jacob and Jaden are Little  Evangelists  for Jesus at the ages of 11 and 13..  I KNOW God has big plans for each of them!! That’s why I walked around in shock for the first 24 hours. I could not imagine them  not here on this earth.  Not in our family.

My Heart even  hurts outside of my own family and My testimony runs much deeper than this.   My  heart breaks to think of what a mother will go through if she chooses a late term abortion.  That might seem the right choice, the easier choice at the time but what will happen in her heart and in her mind afterwards?

All I can say is please choose adoption and not abortion.  I know not everyone feels they can parent a special needs child, and some really don’t  think they have the money to add another child to their family.  Unfortunately,  rapes do still happen. I know some women feel like they don’t have any other choice.  I am not here to judge them even if abortion is the choice they’ve  made. What I am here to say– there is ANOTHER choice.  Choose adoption not abortion. There are many women who’ve had abortions that regret it all their lives.  They mourn that choice even if the abortion was at four weeks when there wasn’t even a heartbeat yet. Some of those Women(or girls)  don’t even feel they deserve to parent a child after an abortion. If that torment happens at early gestation abortions I  can not even imagine the torment and pain a mother will experience in late gestation abortions.   There are so many couples waiting for a child to love.  Not a perfect, healthy,  white or black child, any child.

We have three sons that God knew before they were born. Thankfully their moms who live in New York  also chose them before they were born too!

. “I knew you before I formed you in your mother’s womb. Before you were born I set you apart and appointed you” Jeremiah 1:5.

And America, all I can say is Pray!  We HAVE to pray!!! Some of the biggest churches in the world were founded on just a few people who chose to pray.  God moves when we pray.  God hears and he moves.  “If my people who are called by my name will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven and I will forgive their sin and heal their land” 2 Chronicles 7:14